Invisible
by KatPeeta23
Summary: Katniss Everdeen is being bullied to hell because she's smart and is a music geek. She hates herself, and her school life. Glimmer, the bully, destroys her most precious possession, and Annie helps Katniss pick up the mess. After Katniss's car gets vandalized and the cops are called, everything is about to get much worse, and much better, all at the same time.
1. Chapter 1

The wads of paper fly at my head as the darkness in the room flickers with light as Romeo and Juliet plays across my English 4 classroom.

It's senior year and I've seen this goddamn movie too many times.

Every one of the crumpled up pieces of paper have one word on them written over and over, front to back. One I see, which I know is from Glimmer because she signed it, says _Whore_ written all over it.

I clench my left hand around my pencil and stare at the screen.

Finally, it gets to the point that I'm about to cry, so I get up and go to the bathroom. I have a t-shirt under this sweatshirt. I keep my head down to hide the redness in my eyes, and then I walk into the bathroom. It looks empty, so I take off the sweatshirt and look at the ugly, fresh and old cuts on my wrists, and the scars.

Mama and Daddy would be so upset if they saw the real me. Prim would be, too. They know I'm bullied, but they just don't know how badly.

That's one thing I'm grateful for. The love and support in my life is amazing. My parents are consistent, and they support Prim and I no matter what.

I'm bullied because I'm a music freak. I love everything about music, and I actually have seventeen guitars. I get a new one for my birthday every year. I can play drums, and piano, and keyboard, and violin, and flute. I can sing, too. I'm in guitar and I often have concerts, and I love it. Mama and Daddy come to every performance. My family is wealthy, but Prim and I aren't spoiled. I was born and raised in Philadelphia, and I still live here now.

But then the bully. That's destroys my happiness.

I'm not a whore. In fact, I've never even had a boyfriend, or my first kiss. My parents know this, and they support it.

I am ugly though, but not fat. I'm a geek, and I'm not really proud of it.

Hunter Hayes is my inspiration and I love him.

I am a nerd because I'm a straight A student. Mama and Daddy are very strict about school.

I want to get into Julliard.

I'm so upset right now. I lean against the wall, and some girl walks out of the bathroom.

She's popular. I can't remember her name, but she's one of the poplar's. Glimmer's gang is the second most popular, while this girl is the in the most popular group of all of Northridge High School. Her boyfriend is a football player.

I think they're all snobby bitches.

I pick my sweatshirt up and snatch the paper from my hood and toss it in the trash. There is two pieces. One says nerd and the other says fatass.

I pull my hoodie back on. The final bell rings, and I wash my face off. She stands there in silence, watching me. She looks almost…remorseful. I dry my face, and she walks out, and I wait three minutes before walking out. I got back to English with Mr. Bell, and I grab my bag, but my guitar isn't here.

No. That's my favorite guitar. My Nana got me that for my fifth birthday. It's expensive, and if anything happens to it, I'll fucking die. I'll probably cry.

I turn to face Mr. Bell.

"Where's my guitar?"

He shrugs. "Glimmer said you told her she could borrow it."

God, it's Friday. She has all weekend to destroy it.

I rush out the door and down the hall. If I see her with it, I'll kick her ass.

People are yelling, and I think they're actually yelling stop. There's a circle, and people try to stop me as I shove my way through it.

And there's my guitar, in pieces on the tile of the hallway. Glimmer's standing there, frozen, and it's like the whole world freezes.

Right away, everyone runs, and it's like the whole school disappears, and I'm left alone. The case is still intact.

Cars go flying from the senor parking lot, as I see out the window.

I fall to my knees, literally, and I open the case. Before I can even help it, tears start pouring from my eyes, down my cheeks, and drip to the floor. I sniffle, and wipe my cheeks as I slowly, collect the pieces. I hear footsteps, quiet ones, and then someone kneels down across from me.

"Just leave me alone, okay?" I mumble.

"I'm so sorry this happened." Someone whispers. I look up, and I'm met with the same popular from the bathroom. Her long dark hair cascades far enough that it's about three inches from the floor. She does actually look sorry, and her face is gentle, and her smile is soft. Her green eyes are emerald, and they're wet, with tears, I think. She sticks her hand out. "I'm Annie. Annie Cresta."

I nod. "A cheerleader."

She nods.

"Finnick Odair's girlfriend." She nods again, and tucks her hair behind her left ear.

"You're Katniss Everdeen."

"Nobody knows my name." I mutter.

"Everybody knows your name." she smiles, and I look back at her eyes. She reaches across to brush some of my tears away.

"No, not really." I whisper.

"Yes. You are the most musically talented person in this high school. You can play a ton of instruments, and you can sing. I bet your parents are very proud."

I nod slowly. "Thank you." I whisper, picking up the little tiny shards. I shut the case, and stand up.

"Let me walk you to your car." She says.

I feel like she's fake. She's doing this to get on my good side just to break me.

We walk outside, and when I see my car, I swear I could die.

It's been painted, with terrible, terrible words. _Whore_ and _slut_ and _bitch_ and _music cunt_ and _nerd_ and _know it all._ There's others, but I can't read anymore. He guitar case falls from my hands, and Annie catches it.

"Oh Katniss…" she trails off, and touches the paint. It's still wet. "How about I come to your house? We can wash the car together and um…I don't know, maybe we an invite some of my friends and w can o to the ovies tonight?"

"At my house?" I ask, biting my lip.

"If that's not okay then…" she trails off.

"No, that's okay."

I would ask my parents, but they'll be so thrilled that I have friends over that they won't care, and they'll be pissed enough about the guitar and my car, too.

People well…when they see my house they think of me as a snobby rich kid.

We are…rich. Right when you walk in the door, the stars are on your left. They're huge. There's a door diagonal from the stairs that leads to a bathroom. Down the giant hall, the kitchen is on your right. There is giant professionally take pictures of Prim or I, or the four of us. The kitchen is huge, marble countertops and cream walls. Right in front of you is the living room, which is huge, with a piano, and there's a huge fireplace. The dining room is across from the kitchen, on your left, and that has a 12 seated table. It has another fireplace. In the living room there is a door and it opens into a puny room with a metal spiral staircase. That leads to a bedroom, which just so happens to be my music room. It's filled with records and instruments. There are windows all over that room. Up the stairs right by the door, to your left there is a bedroom, my Mom and Dad's, which has a bathroom attached. There's also a pantry in the kitchen, which I forgot to mention, and it's a walk in pantry. To the left hall, there is a room right at the end, mine, the second biggest, with a bathroom attached. Prim has a room to the left of the left hall with a bathroom attached, and then there is another bedroom, the guest room. It's big, but it's the last biggest. Every room has a window seat, and the front end of the upstairs is windows.

The house is giant, and it has a three car garage attached. There's a pool and a pond in the backyard, every room has a fireplace, and we have two acres of trees. We have four dogs. One is a German Shepard, one is a Siberian Husky, one is a King Charles Spaniel, and one is a golden retriever. All the dogs are protective, and all of them get along. There is also a big porch at the front door, and a side door in the living room that leads out to the pool.

Oh, and there's a basement, which is a game room and a movie theatre.

My car though, is a 2013 Chevrolet Malibu LS. It's white.

Annie pulls up behind me in her car, and I get in mine and I speed to my house, because I don't want anyone to see the car.

There's no cars outside. They could be in the garage, but I'm hoping nobody is home so they don't have to find out how bad Glimmer is. I volunteer at Sam Ash and I also work there so all my college is paid for. I have money to fix the guitar, but I look like I was crying, and Mama is gonna know.

I get out and shut the door and lock the car, with my shattered guitar, and my school bag.

"You _live_ here?" Annie asks.

"Uh…yeah." I say.

"Dang."

"It doesn't make me a snobby rich kid." I say. She laughs.

"My house is five room and five point five bathrooms. It's huge too, but…still. Your house is beautiful."

"Thanks. Now be quiet, I don't want Mama and Daddy to find out." She nods, and I slip into the house. She follows me, and I almost get to the music room, before I hear Mama clear her throat.

"Katniss." She says. I freeze. "Come here."

I look at her in fear, and I see her see I've been crying, and concern crosses her face.

"Let me just put this upstairs-"

"Nope, let me see it." She says.

"Mama-"

"No honey. You've been crying. Let me see the guitar."

Slowly, I walk into the kitchen and set my guitar case on the counter. She pens the case, and the blood runs from her face. "Ethan!" she shouts.

"Mama!" I hiss.

Daddy walks into the kitchen and sees I've been crying, too, and he looks in the case, and he looks _pissed_.

"Who did this?" he asks.

"I-I don't know!"

"You're lying! Is this the bitch that's been bullying you?" Mama demands.

"mama-"

"Answer the question."

"Yes." I whisper, and they both look pissed.

Prim comes downstairs then. She's seven, but she's not stupid.

"What happened to your car?" she asks. I look at her in rage, and both Mama and Daddy go out to the porch.

Mama comes back in first. "This is ridiculous!" she says. "Explain." She says, and Daddy walks in.

I take in a shaky breath. Annie's silent, watching.

"I was watching Romeo and Juliet in English and…they started throwing paper at me and they wrote mean names all over them and…well, I was going to cry so I went to the bathroom and…the bell rang and I went back to the class and…and my guitar was gone. By the time I got there, it was too late. She destroyed it, and…" I take in a deep breath and wipe away my sleeve slipped up a little too far, and I know Mama saw the secrets, because her eyes widen but she doesn't do anything else. "Well, Annie came over and she calmed me down and helped me pick up the pieces and…she walked me to my car and…" I sigh. "We saw that, and now she's here to help me wash it off and her friends are gonna come over and…" I trail off.

"Katniss," Mama says carefully. "Take your sweatshirt off."

"No." I say. Daddy catches on, and so does Annie.

"Take it off." Mama says. I can tell I don't have a choice. Slowly, I pull off my sweatshirt, and ll of them see the cuts. Mama turns around without a word, and I hear her crying and then her door slams. Daddy looks pissed, and he picks up the phone and calls something. He walks outside and slams that door, and then Prim walks away, and it's just Annie and I.

"Katniss." Annie whispers. I shake my head.

"You should go." I whisper. "You can come back tomorrow or…I'll see you Monday. I can take care of the car."

"Katniss." Annie sighs. I shake my head, and she turns around and walks out.

I bolt upstairs to my room, and I fall face first on my bed, and I just cry, because today sucked. My car looks terrible, my guitar is destroyed, and now my whole family hates me.

After nearly an hour, I stop crying and roll over and stare at the ceiling. I hear a soft knock on my door, and Mama comes in. She's alone.

"I really don't want to talk right now." I whisper.

She sits down next to me in silence. "Then you can just listen." She whispers, running her fingers through my hair. "Your father called the police and he's going to the station to get that girls fingerprints off your guitar. The school has footage of her vandalizing your car, and of her destroying your guitar." She sighs. "Honey, I wish…you would talk to me instead of harming yourself. You are worth so much more than this. I've made you an appointment for the doctors and tomorrow, you're going to get depression medicine. If you keep this up, I won't have any choice but rehab. Now, I want to go to your bathroom and get anything you use to do that."

"Mama." I whisper.

"No, Katniss." She says. "I don't want my little girl doing this. You're so beautiful and talented and smart and amazing. Are you really going to let some bitch destroy you?"

I stay silent. "How long have you been doing this to yourself?" I don't answer. "Katniss." She says.

"Since ninth grade." I mumble. She nods, and she's masking her emotions. Daddy is going to take your guitar to the guitar doctor and get it fixed. It'll be okay sweetie, I promise." She kisses my forehead and stands up.

"I will be checking your body every day." She says. "And yes, I mean your whole body."

I sigh softly. "Okay."

"Now, show me where the blade is."

I take her to the bathroom, and I hand her to blade, and she searches through the cabinets and takes anything fishy.

"And I will be sitting in here while you shower, so when you shave I'm here."

And then she makes me strip naked, and she walks around me. I decide to just shower now, and then, with her and Prim's begging, I put on shredded jean short shorts, a black bra, and a black tank top. Mama covers my wrist in ointment and Band-Aids and scar cream, and then I go downstairs with her.

"Where'd that girl go?" Mama asks.

"Uh, I made her leave."

She sighs. "What's her name?" she asks.

"Annie." I say.

"Annie what?"

"Cresta." I reply. She pulls out her phone and after a minute or two, she dials a number and walks out to the patio.

I grab a bag of sour cream and onion chips and sit lay down on the couch and flip the TV on to Million Dollar Listing: New York.

I love this show. Fredrick is funny and Ryan is hot. Luis is okay, but he's getting a bit over his head with his job and he's being a bit self-centered. Mama gets off the phone and calls someone else, and then she hangs up and comes inside and starts dinner.

She's making a giant dinner.

It smells really good. I put the chips away, and I put them in the pantry, and go peek over her shoulder.

Mmmm, chicken cutlets, mashed potatoes, and green beans.

"Katniss," Mama begins. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, what is it?"

"Are you skinny like that because you're fit, or because you have another thing I should know about it?"

I smile. "I'm fit, Mama."

She nods, and I help her make the rest of it. Daddy gets home right as it finishes.

"Bad news." He says. "They can't arrest or fine her because she's a minor, but she's getting community service."

Great, now she's going to be pissed and she'll make sure my life is even worse than it is now.

Dammit, I miss my blade.


	2. Chapter 2

I picked up my fixed guitar on Monday morning. It's tuned and looks good as new. I'm nervous for school. I washed my car with Prim on Saturday. Annie didn't show up, and I didn't want her to. I miss my blade, and now my wrist is just scars, and Mama keeps putting that scar cream on it. I'm on depression medicine. It won't work for a month and Mama and Daddy have to be watching me to see if I'm having some weird reaction to the medicine.

I'm scared shitless for school today. The deputy at the school is supposed to be keeping an eye on me, and they brought in another deputy that's supposed to keep an eye on Glimmer.

He isn't doing a very good job because right when I walk in the door, she calls me a bitch and slams the books from my hands.

I sigh quietly and pick them up, and then don't say a word to her as I go to my table. Everyone immediately gets up and moves.

I go to my phone and pretend to be playing a game. I don't see Glimmer come, until she's almost to te table and a loud female voice echoes across the cafeteria and causes the whole room to go quiet.

"God dammit Glimmer, stop being such a fucking cunt to her! She's such a good person and you're such a bitch!"

Everyone gets quiet, and there stands no one other than Johanna Mason. Annie's crying with her face in Finnick Odair's chest, and Peeta Mellark looks irritated with Glimmer, his arms crossed, his hands in fists.

Glimmer turns around, and I just stare.

Annie waves me over to them, and I grab my shit and stand up.

"Excuse me? What the fuck did you just say?" Glimmer snaps. Johanna drops her bag.

"I said to stop being a cunt to Katniss. She's a good person and you're a bitch. If you had your hearing aid turned up, you probably would have heard me!"

Glimmer does actually have hearing problems and she does actually have hearing aids.

Johanna Mason looks at me. "Katniss, come here. Annie's been worried to hell about you all weekend."

Why? Annie isn't my friend and…how the fuck do all these people know my name?

Walk past Glimmer, over to Annie, who ditches Finnick and hugs me instead. I hug her back, and she pulls away to look in my eyes. "Are you okay?" she asks. I nod, and she grabs my guitar case and puts it on the table, and she opens it up, and she smiles. Johanna looks over her shoulder and picks up my guitar.

No. I don't like people touching my instruments, especially people I hardly know.

"Look bitch. It was fixed. Now you have community service and you didn't even faze her."

Finnick disappears and comes back with an amplifier and plugs it in.

"Play it." Johanna says.

"Um…" I hesitate.

"Do it, or I will." She says, and she strums, and starts playing shit, and it almost makes me cringe. I take it from her hands.

"What am I playing?" I ask quietly.

"Play Free Bird, by uh, god, I don't remember. Just do the super hard solo. You know that, right?" Finnick Odair asks.

I sigh. "Fine." I grab my pick from my case. Everyone is watching me, but this is what I want to do for a living. "It's four minutes long, just the solo itself um…"

"She can't do it. Free bird is fucking impossible. She has no talent. She just has so many guitars because she's spoiled."

That pisses me off, so I adjust the sounds. I have it memorized, and I take a deep breath, and I start the solo. People's jaws drop because it's one of the most complicated guitar solos in guitar history.

The bell rings right as I finish it, and I hurry to class.

…..i…..

On the way to seventh period, I stop at my locker. Glimmer walks by, and knocks all my books from my hands. The tardy bell rings. The pain I feel today is so great, that I just slide down my locker and just sit there, with one leg up, and the other out in front of me. My books and pencils are all over the floor.

I sit here until the last period ends, and then I grab everything, and I shove them in my bag and I slam my locker. Annie, Johanna, Peeta, and Finnick are walking towards me. they see I'm crying, and just as they're about to stop me, I run, shoving people out of the way, my bag slung over my shoulder. I get in my car, and I speed out of there, and I go home. Mama and Daddy aren't home and neither is Prim. I go to my bathroom, and I grab my razor. I drag it right across my wrist five times, and then go up and down twice.

It hurts, but god, it feels so good at the same time. I kick my door shut and lock it, and I lean against the counter with my eyes shut, and feel the warmth drip down my arm and fingertips. The doorbell rings, and rings again, and then rings nonstop, and I know it's probably Annie or someone. The front door slams.

"Katniss!" it's Johanna, and it's Annie.

God! Why can't they just leave me alone? I was so much happier alone!

I clean off my wrist and the floor, and I wash my razor and cover my wrist in ointment and a Band-Aid, and then I walk out of the bathroom.

"I don't know what room is hers." I hear Annie say. "All I saw was the kitchen."

I hear the front door shut, and I hear Mom's voice.

"I'm Johanna." Johanna says to Mama.

"What brings you guys here?" Mama asks.

"Katniss ran away from us today, and she came here and she's silent. Um…Glimmer did something. She skipped seventh period, and she was crying." Annie explains quietly.

I lay down on my bed and let tears fall.

I hear three sets of footsteps, and then Mama tries to open my door, and since it's locked, she can't get in. I hear her sigh.

"I got this." Johanna says. Thirty seconds later, the door opens.

"Katniss." Mama says. "What happened?"

She sits down next to me, and Johanna and Annie sit down too.

"Katniss." Annie says.

"You can talk to us." Johanna says. I stand up.

"I can't keep doing this!" I snap, and I'm crying so hard that it's difficult to speak. "I'm sick and tired of feeling worthless and ugly and like a whore or…or whatever she decides to call me! After four years of it, you start to believe it! I'm tired of doing this all the time!" I show them my wrist. "I hate having no friends! I haven't had a sleepover since I was fucking thirteen! I'm tired of hating myself, and I'm tired of dreading school. It would be so much easier to just swallow the pills and get it over with. I'm going to die one day a-a-anyways!"

Mama looks like she just got slapped. Johanna is impossible to read, and Annie looks like she's on the verge of tears.

Mama gets up and goes to my bathroom, and she grabs a ton of stuff, and then she comes back and makes me sit down. She takes the Band-Aid off my wrist, which is still bleeding, and she washes it with a wash cloth and soapy water. She pats it dry, and puts ointment and scar cream on it, and then she puts a Band-Aid on it and stands up, grabbing my shoulders.

"You listen to me and you listen to me closely. Are you listening?" I nod, wiping my tears. "You are a beautiful young woman. You are the strongest person I know. You've lasted nearly four years. You have friends, they're sitting right there. Just because you just met them doesn't mean they're not your friends. They're here for you. Do _not_ ever give up, do you hear me? You have a few more months and you never have to step a foot back in the building! You have an excellent voice and you are _very_ talented. You have dreams, Katniss! Don't let her win! Don't throw all your dreams away because of _one_ bitch! Don't let her win. Don't throw your life away. I have the utmost faith in you. Honey, tomorrow, you're not wearing a sweatshirt. You're going to change, and I'm going to help you. I want you to change your clothes to what you'd wear away from her. A sweatshirt is not your weekend clothes. You want friends? Make some. Stand up for yourself. Fight her if you have to, just don't start it. Be yourself, not this depressed little girl. That's not you."


	3. Chapter 3

I wear a white dress that just barely scrapes the dress code length, and a jean jacket that actually is camo green. My shoes are white wedges, and I wear bracelets on my cut wrist. I bring my guitar, and I leave my hair out instead of braiding it. I don't do makeup. I grab my bag, and I walk out the door.

Johanna, Peeta, Annie, and Finnick are outside the door, waiting for me. I won't fight Glimmer today, because I'm in a dress. The five of us walk in, and Glimmer starts in, and I flat out tell her to shut up, and she goes silent, surprised. I sit down with them and I cross my legs like a lady.

"You look better without a sweatshirt." Peeta says. "But you still look good in the sweatshirt." I smile.

"Thank you."

He nods. Johanna's looking between the two of us.

"Is there something going on that we should know about?" Johanna demands.

Peeta and I shake our heads.

"Good." Johanna says. She looks at me and her gaze gets serious. "How are you holding up?"

I shrug. "I'm okay. I can't shut my door and...yeah, I have a lot of restrictions and Mama and Daddy are fretting over me but..." I shrug. "It's okay. I think they told my sister to sleep in my room last night." I sigh. "But I'm okay."

She nods.

The bell rings, so I grab my stuff and race off to first period.

...9...

The day sucked. The only good part was lunch because I sat with Johanna, Annie, Peeta, and Finnick. Glimmer is being extra terrible. The week continues with me running from them crying and then either calling or showing up at my house. Now, on Friday, the football game is cancelled because there is a really bad storm coming. It's supposed to be really cold tonight. It's early November. It's lunch now, and the principle comes rushing into the cafeteria. Her hair is wild, and she looks super stressed out. She goes to the assistant principle and says something, and then takes the microphone. "Attention all students and staff. There is going to be a horrible storm. It's headed this way and we are under a tornado watch. School is being ended. Please, if you can, drive people home. The busses are on their way, but we can't guarantee they'll be here in time."

People get up and run, and I see Peeta and Johanna pulling out their phones. They're frantically trying to call someone.

"Katniss, can I borrow some clothes and send the night?" Annie asks.

"I'll ask my Mom." I call Mama, and ask if all of them can, and she readily agrees.

"Need a ride?"

"Are you pregnant?" some chick asks me, pulling out her phone.

"No…" I trail off.

"Are you a druggie?"

"No!" I snap.

"Are you in love with Mr. Cinna?"

"Ew! No!"

"You're a lesbian. I know it."

"No, I'm not." I say.

"Well, everyone thinks you are. There's a rumor going around that you are. Apparently you had sex with Mr. Cinna and now you're pregnant with his kid."

I spent a lot of my time in his classroom, but that's because he's the music teacher.

I look at Johanna, and at Annie, and at Finnick, and Peeta, and then I bolt. I speed home, and I don't stop for the lights. I have hours until Mama gets home. I lock the front door, and I run to the kitchen.

I'm done. I can't do it. I'm trying, but I can't. I can't continue. I can't last the next few months. I've lasted a while, but a while ends eventually, and now is eventually.

I stare at the knife for a long time. I hear people banging on the door. It's Annie, and Peeta, Johanna, and Finnick are with her. They're all yelling don't do it, but I do. I take the knife, and I drag it along my arm, and I carve in my skin, "_I'M INVISIBLE!"_

Blood is pouring from my arm. I run upstairs to Mama and Daddy's room. Blood is staining my dress, and the knife is in my hand. I can hear one of them on the phone outside the door, and then sirens are wailing in the distance. One of them gets on the phone again. I grab the bottle of sleeping pills from Mama's bathroom cabinet, and I swallow all of them, and then, hiccupping, and sobbing I run to my bathroom, and I feel a sharp pain hit my temple, and then nothing.

**I'm shaking and crying so bad right now guys omg**


	4. Chapter 4

I hear whispers throughout the room. Some voices are familiar, and I haven't heard some of them for months.

_I'm alive?_

_NO!_

There's an annoying beeping filling the room. Something's on my finger, and on my arm, and I feel tape on the back of my hand. I have a headache, and my arm hurts, bad.

I can hear someone arguing, sounds like Mama.

My bones are stiff. That beeping speeds up a little bit, and I realize that it's my heart monitor.

The whispering and arguing stops. I move my fingers a little bit, and I can feel my face screw up in pain.

"She's waking up." An unknown voice says. "Congratulations. You've won."

"Katniss?" I hear a voice, Mama. Her arm hand clasps my cold one.

"Come on Kitten, look at us." Daddy's hand grabs my other one.

It's a struggle, but I manage to force my eyes open, and Mama starts crying, and Daddy's crying, but they're happy. Nana's here, and my cousin Jessica, and my Papa, and Prim, and all my Aunt's and Uncle's.

It's cold in here.

Mama starts fretting, and she covers me up to my chin. The doctor starts checking me, looking into my eyes with a flashlight. I mumble that I have a headache when he asks what's wrong, and that my arm hurts, and he starts giving me meds. After a while, he goes into the hall and says something, and I hear some quiet cheering.

"Why am I not dead?" I mutter.

"Because." Mama kisses my forehead and runs her fingers through my hair. "WHats the last thing you remember?"

"A pain in my head and then nothing."

She nods. "Well, Annie, Johanna, Peeta, and Finnick followed you home from school. You locked the door and they couldn't get in, but they called the police, and Finnick and Peeta broke the door open. You were laying in the bathroom. Honey, you nearly bled to death. Your heart wasn't even beating. Finnick did chest compressions until the medicas got there, and Annie took your phone and called me. You've een here since, in a coma."

"A coma?" I mutter.

She nods. "Honey, it's Christmas break. I've got all of your school work, and I have tutors lined up for you."

"I'm not going to rehab."

"Well I don't want this to happen again…and if that's the answer..."

"It won't happen again. I'll go to your work every day after school so I can't do anything, and I'll stay downstairs until bed, and I'll sleep with the door open and the light on. Please don't send me to rehab."

She gives in, and I whisper, "How many people know?"

"Too many," Daddy says, and he kisses my forehead. "Your story went viral. There's pictures of your arm, and there was a whole story about bullying. Many people at your school are protesting against bullying, and with Glimmer and her gang…well, they got fined big time. Word on the street is that Glimmer's parents won't pay the fine for her, she's grounded until she turns eighteen, and she has to ride the bus."

That makes me smile.

"Your friends come here every day." Nana says. "But it's exams in two weeks, so they're not coming until exams are over."

I nod slowly. "I wanna go home."

"And you can. We just don't know when. Let me go demand answers." Mama says, and she walks out the door.

She comes back fifteen minutes later. "Two days."

…..a…..

Right when I could be up and moving, I was going to tutoring like it was school. Six hours, every five days. One hour with each of my teachers. All of my teachers dropped everything for their vacations to help me, and they're being extra nice. Once I know everything I've missed, I start studying nonstop. Mama keeps pestering me, insisting that I don't have to go to school if I don't want to.

"I can do it Mama." I whisper. "I want to."

I have to play a hard song for guitar, which should be easy. I'll just play free bird or something.

I pick out my favorite guitar, and I put on skinny jeans, a long sleeve white knit sweater, boots, and then a tan jacket, the kind that has the buttons in the front and frills out like a dress, almost like it's a coat everyone wears in New York. It's snowing when I go outside, so I put on a white scarf, and get my hair down, and I get in my car and head to school.

I start getting nervous, but excited to see Finnick and Annie and Johanna and Peeta.

I leave my guitar in the car, and put my bag over my shoulder.

No. I turn around, and I grab my guitar. Who cares if I get noticed? I'm a different person now.

Slowly, after locking my car, I go into the building, and some people gasp. Others even smile.

Glimmer doesn't say a word, she just stares.

Johanna gasps, and smacks Annie's arm.

"Ow! What the hell Jo!"

She points, and Finnick, Annie, and Peeta look over their shoulders.

Annie squeals like a little girl. "You're alive!" she starts crying, and runs for me, nearly knocking me over. Her grip is deathlike. I hug her back. "Oh my god, Katniss!" She says.

Johanna hugs me next, and then Finnick and Peeta.

They nearly drag my to the table.

"When did you wake up?" Annie demands.

"Um, the twenty first."

"Oh my god, and you didn't tell me!" She snaps. "I'm sorry, I just wanted to surprise you guys…" I mutter, smiling.

"Let me see your arm." Johanna says. "I want to see it.

I sigh, because I know she won't give up, and then I take off the coat, and I let her roll my sleeve up. It's scarred and ugly, but on spring break, Mama's going to get me to go a plastic surgeon an get it removed.

"I'm sleeping over Friday." Annie says. "I've decided. We're going to sit in your room and watch Christmas movies, or I'm going to watch you play guitar."

"Or I can show you the basement."

"Fine, um, do you realize today is exam day?"

"Yes, I'm ready. I got straight A's on all the study sheets."

They nod.

"It's refreshing to see your eyes again." Peeta says softly. Finnick snorts, and Johanna smirks, and Annie smiles, and I feel my entire face go red.

"Um…thanks."

To be honest, I have a crush on him, and if he asked me out I would say yes because he's hot, and he's sweet.

The bell rings, and people vanish.

"Since we don't have exams on Friday, there's a talent show to fill up the day." Annie explains. "You better audition so I can dance with Johanna, because we're in dance."

I laugh.

"I don't know about that."

"Why?" Peeta says. "You have more talent. Everyone has been hoping that you'd wake up in time to do it."

"I'll think about it, okay? I have to go."

I grab all of my stuff and rush off to class.

….a….

I aced all my exams. I got an extra five points in guitar, for 'personality'.

Mama and Daddy were so proud that they went out and got me a new guitar, but I'm not playing it today in school. I'll be playing piano. It's silver glittered, electric. It's gorgeous.

Today will be my first time playing guitar and singing at school.

I'm wearing a light aqua long sleeve shirt and white skinny jeans. My hair us up in a bun. Johanna and Annie are going to be dancing. They've practiced all week. With _everyone's_ requesting, we've been asked to start the show off.

I'm nervous. I put all of my stuff at my seat in the audience. I've been asked to be front row, and I'm between Annie and Peeta. Johanna is next to Peeta and Finn is next to Annie.

I go backstage, and Johanna and Annie are there, in the same dress. They look pretty, and their dress is the color of my shirt. There's a rumor going around that someone _important_ is at the school. I don't know what that means, but there is a certain amount of excitement today. Mama and Daddy are here, and Nana, because she refused to leave for my first week of school so she would make sure I was standing strong. I didn't tell anyone but Annie and Johanna that I'm actually singing today, and they're the only ones that know what I'm playing. Annie cried, and she told me she was super proud. Johanna pated my back and said she was glad I grew some balls.

I'm ashamed for what I did, and I realize now that I'm beautiful.

Cinna announces us, and people whistle, and I can see Mama, and Daddy, and Nana clapping. People are standing up, and we haven't even started yet.

The only lights that are one are spotlights, one Johanna, Annie, and I. I go to the piano, which has a microphone, and Johanna and Annie take their stance.

People see the microphone and start whispering. I nod at Johanna and Annie, and after taking a deep breath, I start to play piano. After a note, I whisper "Don't look at me." and people know what song it is right away.

A few more notes, I start with high notes.

_Every day is so wonderful_

_Then suddenly it's hard to breathe._

_Now and then I get insecure_

_From all the pain, I'm so ashamed._

_I am beautiful no matter what they say._

_Words can't bring me down._

_I am beautiful in every single way._

_Yes, words can't bring me down... Oh no._

_So don't you bring me down today._

_To all your friends you're delirious,_

_So consumed in all your doom._

_Trying hard to fill the emptiness._

_The pieces gone, left the puzzle undone._

_is that the way it is?_

_You are beautiful no matter what they say_

_Words can't bring you down...oh no_

_You are beautiful in every single way_

_Yes, words can't bring you down, oh, no_

_So don't you bring me down today..._

_No matter what we do_

_(no matter what we do)_

_No matter what we say_

_(no matter what we say)_

_We're the song inside the tune_

_Full of beautiful mistakes_

My voice cracks, and I realize that I'm actually crying, but I tough through it and keep going.

_And everywhere we go_

_(and everywhere we go)_

_The sun will always shine_

_(the sun will always, always shine)_

_And tomorrow we might wake on the other side_

_We are beautiful no matter what they say_

_Yes, words won't bring us down, no, no_

_We are beautiful in every single way_

_Yes, words can't bring us down, oh, no_

_So don't you bring me down today_

_Oh, yeah, don't you bring me down today, yeah, ooh_

_Don't you bring me down ooh... today_

I wipe my tears, and everyone stands up, and we get a standing ovation.

We go down to our seats, and sit down.

A few ridiculous people go, and there is a few good ones. After this, we can kind of do whatever we want. We get to go out to the football field, and we can have a snowball fight. I have every intention of starting one. Everyone has to be outside though.

Cinna comes out to the stage at ten thirty. School gets out at one thirty five.

"Okay." He says. "After this last person, all students must report to the cafeteria for lunch, and then from there, we will go out to the football field and will do whatever." He pauses. "This person is twenty two years old, he is actually quiet famous, he is from Breaux Bridge, LA, and he is here to sing his new song. Us, at Northridge High School get the pleasure of hearing his new song first. Now, without further ado, please welcome, Hunter Hayes!"

My hand clams down on Annie's arm, and my other hand clamps down on Peeta's, and I swear I'm going to pass out.

Hunter Hayes is my inspiration! He's the bae! I have all his albums, and he is the only music I listen to. He's hot as hell, and I love him.

This must be a joke.

Everyone cheers, and all I can do is stare as he walks out to the stage with his six string over his shoulder. His band is with him. he goes up to the microphone. "Hey." He says. I look at Peeta, and then at Annie. Clearly, they knew. Peeta's behind it.

Actually, I think everyone knew, and that's why Mama and Daddy and Nana are _really_ here.

"I guess I'll just say what brought me here." He says. "There's a very important girl, and her name is Katniss Everdeen."

They don't put the spotlight on me, but he knows where I'm sitting, and he looks right at me, and he waves. I just stare, and he smiles, and oh my god. Mama, Daddy, and Nana move to sit on the ground in front of us.

"Katniss Everdeen is a _beautiful_, _amazing_, and very, very talent young lady. She's a few months shy from being eighteen, but she was just released from the hospital because she was bullied to her breaking point. Now, originally I was going to make her come up here but right now it looks like she's cutting circulation off from her friends arms." He laughs, and it's music to my ears. "Anyways, she was bullied because she's smart. She was bullied because she's very good a music. And you know what Katniss? SO was i. I was bullied because I was a nerd. I hated everything in high school, but I had a very good support system at home. And sure, I spent my weekends alone, but I was okay, because I loved what I was doing. I'm a geek, and I'm proud of it, but it took me a while to realize it was okay to _be_ proud of it. My past has shaped me into who I am today, and with your talent, I bet we have similar futures. Anyways, Katniss, once I heard your story, I decided to write a song. You inspired me. But before I sing it, I have to know. Do you, your friends, and your parents and sister and grandma want to come out with me tonight, with my parents?"

I can just barely manage a nod. He smiles. "Good. Now, lets do this boys."

His pianist starts the piano, and he starts to sing.

_Crowded hallways are the loneliest places_

_For outcasts and rebels_

_Or anyone who just dares to be different_

_And you've been trying for so long_

_To find out where your place is_

_But in their narrow minds_

_There's no room for anyone who dares to do something different_

_Oh, but listen for a minute_

_Trust the one_

_Who's been where you are wishing all it was_

_Was sticks and stones_

_Those words cut deep but they don't mean you're all alone_

_And you're not invisible_

_Hear me out,_

_There's so much more to life than what you're feeling now_

_Someday you'll look back on all these days_

_And all this pain is gonna be invisible_

_Oh, invisible_

_So your confidence is quiet_

_To them quiet looks like weakness_

_But you don't have to fight it_

_'Cause you're strong enough to win without a war_

_Every heart has a rhythm_

_Let yours beat out so loudly_

_That everyone can hear it_

_Yeah, I promise you don't need to hide it anymore_

_Oh, and never be afraid of doing something different_

_Dare to be something more_

_Trust the one_

_Who's been where you are wishing all it was_

_Was sticks and stones_

_Yeah, the words cut deep but they don't mean you're all alone_

_And you're not invisible_

_Hear me out,_

_There's so much more of this life than what you're feeling now_

_And someday you'll look back on all these days_

_And all this pain is gonna be invisible_

_These labels that they give you_

_just 'cause they don't understand_

_If you look past this moment_

_You'll see you've got a friend_

_Waving a flag for who you are_

_And all you're gonna do_

_Yeah, so here's to you_

_And here's to anyone who's ever felt invisible_

_Yeah, and you're not invisible_

_Hear me out,_

_There's so much more to life than what you're feeling now_

_And someday you'll look back on all these days_

_And all this pain is gonna be invisible_

_It'll be invisible_

I'm crying when it's over, and he comes over, and he _hugs_ me, and people are screaming.

He's gone then, and Cinna sends everyone to the lunchroom. Mama and Daddy and Nana hug me, and Mama says that she'll take me and the girls shopping for clothes for tonight, and she kisses my forehead and sends me off to lunch.

The halls are empty when Jo, Ann, Finn, and Peeta and I get to them. Everyone is ahead of Peeta and I, and he stops.

"Let them go." He says, pulling me into a doorway. His hand on my hand is warm and comforting, and I really want to kiss him right now. "My cousin's best friend's cousin is best friends with Hunter Hayes' brother."

"What?" I ask dumbly.

"My cousins best friend…" he trails off until I nod. "His cousin…"

"You cousins best friends cousin?" he nods.

"He's best friends with Hunter Hayes' brother. A Christmas I was talking with my cousin and he got some connections and he got me in touch with Hunter Hayes."

"You did this?" I whisper. He nods. I hug him, and he hugs me back, and it's warm and cozy. I turn to go to lunch, but he grabs my hand again.

"Wait." He says. I lean against the wall. "What do you think of me?"

I laugh. "What?"

"I said what do you think of me? Honestly."

"I think you're cute and sweet and I want to kiss you a lot."

He smiles. "I'd do anything for you." He whispers, and I feel my heart beating. "Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

I smile, and I nod, and then he cups the nape of my neck, and he kisses me, right on the lips.

My first kiss.

**This is the last chappy tonight. I'll probably have one up tomorrow, but I'm not making any promises.**


	5. Chapter 5

He takes my hand, and on the way back to the cafeteria, he grabs my waist and puts me on his shoulders and starts to run.

I start yelling at him, and people clap and watch, but five feet from the table he trips.

I start to fall, but he didn't fall down, so he manages to catch me before I fall. He steadies me on his shoulders, and then drops me off at my seat, and forces Finnick to move next to Annie. He grabs my hand.

"Are you two..." Annie trails off. We both nod, and she pumps her fist in the air, not even irritated as I take a handful of her French fries.

Peeta and I were way late, and we get to six for five minutes before we're sent outside. I pull my coat on, along with everyone. We all just stand there, not knowing what to do, so I make a snowball, and I peg it at Johanna, who throws one back, and then we make teams, going by groups. The entire football team is in our group.

People go after one another, and we have he biggest snowball fight ever. The staff records it, and it's awesome. It starts to actually snow, too. I get to hit Glimmer with a snowball without her even knowing and it's awesome. I realize that everyone is going for her.

I make people go against others, and it's nearly an hour after the bell rings that everyone leaves. After calling Mama, she decides that after I come home and eat lunch, we will meet Johanna and Annie and Peeta and Finnick with their parents. Apparently Hunter wants all of our families to come. Mama says he really wants to get to know us, me especially. She thinks I have something big in my future.

This will be the first time I will see Peeta's parents. His brothers are coming. I hug everyone goodbye and go home.

"Katniss?" Mama asks when I walk in the door. She starts to fret when she sees I'm soaked, and makes me go take a shower, muttering how I'll be sick.

I don't cut. I don't need to. A blade can't help me. I pull on skinny blue jeans, a coral long sleeve shirt, but with black sleeves, a gray scarf, and my gray uggs.

My hair flows down to my lower back. I go downstairs and get group texts from the group saying they're already at the mall by Starbucks and then Peeta says his parents are eager to meet me. I shovel my food and Mama and Daddy and Nana Prim change, and we leave with my driving. I have on black sunglasses.

"Um... I suppose I should tell you." I say as we enter the mall.

"Tell us what?" Daddy asks.

"Um, Peeta and I are boyfriend and girlfriend."

We're walking fast, and I can already see the group, and they can see me.

Daddy completely stops walking and grabs onto the wall.

"What?" He repeats. "You have a boyfriend?"

I nod.

"That's great, honey." Mama hugs me. "Calm down Ethan." She says.

"Have you kissed?" Daddy asks.

"Yes." He sighs.

"Just be careful. I'll be keeping a close eye on him today." Daddy says.

I sigh. Prim looks happy, and she demands a piggy back ride. I give in, and Mama and Nana try to get us to stop because we're in public, but Annie is on Finn shoulders.

When we get to the group, I put Prim down, and Annie gets down and hugs me. I take off my coat, and I hold it. Annie hugs me.

"Here, I got you hot chocolate." Johanna shoves it into my hand,

And the cup explodes, all over my shirt. "Oh shit." She says. "God, I'm sorry."

"It's okay." I reply.

"Good thing you have a coat." Mama says. She frets, trying to dry it off, and then just walks off and comes back with the exact same shirt, and sends me to the bathroom. I change into it, and I go back. I'm cold now. All the adults start to converse, and Prim hits it off with Annie's little brother. Peeta takes my hand.

"My Dad wants to meet you and my Mom is going to question you and my brothers are going to hit on you." He says, handing me a new hot chocolate.

We go to Tilly's and Finnick grabs a shirt and jeans and shoes. "Good for me." He tosses buys it, and we go to Aeropostale and Johanna and Annie find their outfits, and then Peeta and I decide on Hollister, and I go to the girls clothing. All the females follow me, but Peeta's family and Finnick's, and I find a white tank top, a v-neck red and white knitted sweater, skinny blue jeans, and then a nice white scarf. Mama insists I get new uggs, telling me that mine are looking old and worn.

"That's expensive." I say.

"Your worth it." She says. I sigh and grab the right size and Mama buys. Peeta got his outfit too, and we all go to the mall doors.

"So what happens now? We still have three hours." Finnick says.

"We can all go to our house and I can make snacks." Mama says. "Our house can fit all of us comfortably."

Everyone slowly agrees and they all have to follow me, so I lead everyone to our house. As we all go in, the dogs are flipping out. We go to the living room to start a movie.

I manage to get placed smack dab in the middle of Peeta and his mother.

"Let's switch." Peeta says, tapping my knee.

"No honey, she's okay." Mrs. Mellark says. "I'm not uncomfortable. Are you honey?"

"No." I say.

Dammit, Peeta's next to Daddy.

Right away, she starts questioning. She asks how i am and goes from there, asking every personal thing she can think of. Daddy takes Peeta somewhere and when they come back, Peeta looks pale.

"I'll be right back." I get up and head for my room. Mama says someone should follow me, and Peeta does, and Mama, Daddy, Mrs. Mellark, and Mr. Mellark all stop us.

"You can go to your music room. Leave both doors open." Mama says.

I've never shown anyone my music room. Prim, Mama, and Daddy have seen it, but I'm very private about it.

"Uh..." I hesitate.

"It's there or nowhere." Mama says.

I sigh. I open the only door in the living room.

"Can I come?" Annie asks. "I've been dying to know what's in there."

Finnick and Johanna join.

I hesitate for a whole before letting them come. I go up the spiral stairs and down the little hall to the only door up here. I go in, and they all look shocked.

"Whoa." Johanna says. There is eighteen guitars on the wall, my piano, three violins, and my drums. My two flutes are hooked on the wall, and my desk is littered with papers of songs I've tried to write or have already written.

"Wow." Peeta says, sitting down on the couch. I shrug.

"What'd my dad say to you?" I whisper.

"He showed me his gun." He starts scratching his neck. "He told me it's never been used, said he loved you with all his heart, and then said he's not afraid to use it."

"Oh god, I'm sorry!" I say. He shakes his head.

"It's fine."

...9...

I took another shower and got dressed and now we're on our way.

Goodness, I'm so nervous.

We pull in and his tour bus is here. I make Peeta go first, and he's already here, with the table reserved. He puts his hand on my back to have me sit down. Peeta sits on one side and he sits on the other. Everyone else sits at random places. We all order, and he turns to me.

"You know, you can talk to me, I don't bite."

"I..." Peeta laughs.

"She really looks up to you. She's kind of in shock."

He nods.

"Well your really talented." He says to me.

I let out a breathy, "thanks."

He smiles. "What instruments can you play?"

"Guitar, piano, violin, drums, and flute."

"You're more talented than I am." He says, and I shake my head, but he waves me off with a smile. His parents and my parents are getting along, and Peeta's talking to his brother. "You are Katniss, really." He says. "Your Mother says you have eighteen guitars." He says.

"Yeah um, I get a new one every birthday."

"So you're eighteen?" I shake my head.

"I got a new one because I acted my midterms."

"Wow, you're really smart." He pauses. "How are you doing being back at school?"

"I'm good. I always get a little bit nervous every day but she's backed off because she can't talk to me anymore."

He nods.

Peeta holding my hand under the table.

"Okay, you want to hear a joke?"

I nod.

"A blond got fired from an M&M factory because she threw away all the W's."

"I don't get it." I smile. He laughs and writes an M down on a napkin, and then flips it over. "Wait...oh! She threw away all of them!" We both start laughing.

We talk for a long time, and when our food gets here, we eat and talk, and even after eating, everyone is having such a good time that we get dessert, and then we keep talking for three more hours after that.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" He asks.

"Nothing." I say. I'm not very star struck. He's easy to talk to.

"Well what if I come over and I see your talent?"

"Um..." I ask Mama, and she agrees.

"Great." He smiles. "I think you have a very musical future ahead of you." I smile. "Do you want to go to college?"

"Yes. I want to go to Juilliard."

"Awesome. I bet you'll get accepted."

...9...

He shows up at noon. Johanna, Annie, Peeta, and Finnick spent the night. Mama and Daddy made Peeta and Finnick sleep downstairs.

They're still here, and he tells them they don't have to go. Everyone that was at dinner last night ends up showing up. The guys bring my drums downstairs, and I get my favorite guitar, and my violin, and flute.

"Alright." He paces around the living room a bit. "Just play something really hard on guitar that we'll know. Something make makes your arms hurt and makes you breathless.

I sigh. That means I'm playing free bird.

I set up the amp, and I put the guitar on it's strap and make sure it's tuned.

"Start whenever."

"It's slow at first. It's nine minutes."

He nods, and I start playing it and everyone is waiting anxiously. He starts looking bored, and he sits down with his arms crossed. Finn is singing it and people are going by the words. He goes "lord help me! I can't ch-e-a-ange!"

I start the solo, and he I crosses his arms and it starts getting super hard and I get a bit out of breath. I keep going for our minutes, and by the time in done, he's standing, and his jaw and dropped.

Next, I do piano, and this song is called Buhdaporn. It's hard but I love it.

He's shocked, and I move to drums.

Then, I move to violin. This is called Ernst's Grand Caprice on Schubert's Der Erlkönig.

It's hard as hell, and everyone looks really surprised. Mama and daddy look proud, and Hunter is just watching me with his jaw slack.

Last is the flute. This is The Flight of the Bumblebee.

When I'm done, the guys take everything back upstairs and he looks really surprised.

He starts pacing. "I know you have college and I'm guessing you leave in, I don't know, late July?" I nod. "Well when I go to New York City next time, how about...if your not busy, you can do a concert with me?"

"Are you serious?" I ask. He nods.

"Okay." I smile. He smiles back, and after a few more minutes everyone leaves.

I start doing research on Juilliard and then start studying for next semester by following my textbooks.

...8...

Glimmer's pissed. She realized that Peeta and I are dating, and she's been trying since freshmen year to get him to go out with her. I remember once, she flat out kissed him in the hallway. Peeta put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her off, and said, "please don't do that again."

But now she knows I'm with him so she's trying even harder. Peeta thinks it's funny, and so do I.

We're at lunch now, and Johanna is talking to Johanna and Annie. I'm studying because I have a big test next class. Glimmer approaches the table. "Peeta, you can come sit with us if you want." She smiles. "I don't know why you tolerate her." She looks at me like I'm trash. "She's ugly, and stupid, and a nerd, and a whore. You're just a sex object to her."

People heard, and they all actually look pissed that she's starting in on me. Again.

Peeta looks really mad, and Johanna starts to stand up, and she opens her mouth to say something, but I slam my hands down on the table and stand up.

"You know what? Fuck you! I never did anything to make you hate me so much! Why do you hate me so much? Because I'm smarter than you? Because I hate actual talent and a have a boyfriend that actually cares? The only whore here is you."

"Ohhhh." Echoes around the cafeteria. She narrows her eyes.

"I'm stronger in the head than you though, that's for sure. I didn't try to kill myself." People start whispering about how much if a bitch she is, and I slap her and jump right over the table and punch her in the face, and she hits me back, and we start going at it. People are yelling now, and I feel hands grab my waist and rip me off of her. Peeta stands right in between us.

"Don't touch her." He says.

I'm leaving. Fuck this.

"Let's go girls, my office." The principle says.

I grab all my shit and look right at her, and I say, "No. Fuck you."

Her eyebrows shoot into her hairline and she looks pissed.

"You knew she'd been doing it since freshmen year. You knew, and you didn't do anything until now? Is that because I was almost dead, or because your job was jeopardized?"

"Katniss." Peeta whispers.

"You know what? Don't answer that. I don't need you anyways. I can take care of my fucking self." The bell rings and nobody moves.

With that, I walk right out of the school, and Mr. Cinna holds the door open for me, and he looks proud. I find myself crying as I drive home, and I text Mama and Daddy and tell them everything. They're not mad, and even though I'm guaranteed a suspension, they're not mad. Daddy said it's about time I stuck up for myself.

I wipe tears away and dump my bag in my room and out my guitar in my music room, and then, really crying now, I go to the kitchen. I open the knife drawer, and I just stare at them. Buster, the German Shepard, nudges my leg with his nose and whines. It's almost like he's telling me not to do it.

No. I won't let her win. I hear the front door shut, and Peeta walks right into the kitchen. He took Finnick's car.

"Shut the drawer." He says. I don't, so he walks over and shuts it. "You don't need that." He whispers.

I bite my lip and look away. He doesn't need to see me hurting.

"Come here." He pulls me upstairs and grabs my only acoustic guitar. He grabs a pick, and he starts to play.

_When you try not to look at me_

_Scared that I'll see you hurting_

_You're not hiding anything, no_

_And frankly it's got me worried_

_Nobody knows you better than I do_

_I keep my promises, I'm fighting for you_

_You're not alone_

_I'll listen till your tears give out_

_You're safe and sound, I swear that I won't let you down_

_What's hurting you I, I feel it too_

_I mean it when I say_

_When you cry, I cry with you, with you_

_I'm not going any place_

_I just hate to see you like this_

_No, I can't make it go away_

_Oh, but keeping it inside won't fix it_

_I can't give you every answer that you need_

_But I wanna hear everything you wanna tell me_

_You're not alone_

_I'll listen till your tears give out_

_You're safe and sound, I swear that I won't let you down_

_What's hurting you I, I feel it too_

_I mean it when I say_

_When you cry, I cry with you, oh_

_Yeah, I cry with you_

_You need love tough enough to count on_

_So here I am_

_You're not alone_

_I'll listen till your tears give out_

_You're safe and sound, I swear that I won't let you down_

_What's hurting you I, I feel it too_

_I mean it when I say_

_When you cry, I cry_

_I mean it when I say_

_When you cry, I cry with you, oh_

_You're not alone, oh no, baby_

When he's done, he puts the guitar back, and even though I'm crying harder. Mama and Daddy both texted to ask if I'm alone and I told them no, that Peeta's with me, that we won't do anything, and that I'll be okay.

"Come here." He whispers. He pulls me into his arms, and picks me up and carries me to the couch. He lays down, and let's me cry, laying on top of him. He runs his fingers through my hair, and eventually, I fall asleep.

...9...

I wake to the sound of whispering. I don't move, but I'm still on top of Peeta.

"Thank you." That's Mama.

"I think you guys need to lock that drawer." Peeta whispers.

"Why?" That's Daddy.

"Because when I walked in she had the drawer open and Buster was crying."

Mama sighs. "Okay. She's going to get suspended."

"I know, and she does too, but honestly, she doesn't care. I think she's just counting down the days until she's done."

"Trust me, we all are." Mama whispers. I move my hand, and then my head. The room goes completely silent.

"Peeta." I mumble, feeling around for his face.

"Hmm?" He asks. I move my hand from his face to right over his heart.

"Let's go upstairs." I roll off of him and stand up.

"Katniss." Mama sighs.

"We're not going to do anything." I say, pulling him off the couch, and down the hall, up the stairs, to my bedroom. I shut the door, and he lays down, and I lay next to him. His fingers run gently through my hair. I don't do to sleep, I just lay in his arms. "Peeta?" I whisper.

"Hmm?" He mumbles, rubbing my back.

"If you want to go be with Glimmer, you can." I whisper. He body goes ridged and his hand clenches into a fist on my back. I sit up, and he puts his arms behind his head and stares into my eyes for a very long time.

"Is that what this is about?" He asks. His voice is impossible to read, and so is his face. "You think I'm going to leave you for Glimmer?"

I look down. He sits up and tilts my chin up so our eyes meet. "Katniss, I will never leave you. The only way I can ever see us ending is if you end it. I don't like Glimmer. I never want to be see with anyone but you, Katniss I..." He hesitates, reading me closely. "I love you." This is the first time he's said it.

I start crying again, but this time it's happy tears, and I kiss him. I don't let it last very long.

"I love you, too." I whisper, and I mean it, because I really do.

I really want to actually make out with him, but I can't because my parents are downstairs. I turn on the TV and then I turn to him. "Where do you want to go for college?"

He sighs. "Stanford."

That's in California, clear across the country. "For business, He says. "Finnick is coming too, and Johanna, if she can get in. Annie actually wants Juilliard but she might not be able to get in."

"We're going to be across the country from each other." He nods slowly.

"My parents might move close by me...but, I think we'll keep our relationship as long as we stay faithful and we stay connected."

I nod slowly.

"I'm gonna miss you." I'm a hairline from his lips.

"We'll make it." He whispers. "Let's make a promise right now, that we'll stay faithful, unless we officially break up. If we lose touch, never give up hope. I will find you. I'll always find you."

"I promise." I whisper.

"I promise." He mumbles. We don't care how cheesy it is. We do a pinky promise, and then I scoot right into his lap, tangle my fingers in his hair, and I kiss him.


	6. Chapter 6

We made out intensely, and our hands were roaming, but we never went past clothing.

God, he's hot, and he's really good at making out.

I didn't get a call telling me not to go to school, so I walk right in the doors. I don't care. I go the my table, and right away, the principle stops me.

"Come to my office." He says.

"Why don't you just say it here? Everyone is going to find out anyways." I'm not being disrespectful, I'm just being completely honest. He sighs.

"Fine. You're suspended."

"How long?" I ask.

"Come back Monday." He says.

I start getting a little pissed. "Okay." I walk out the door and I make sure it slams.

Why would he fucking do that? I'm the highest person in his the school with grades, and yet he still kicks me out? Whatever, I'll get my work from Peeta."

I go right back home, and I go right back to sleep.

…..a…..

I do major Juilliard research, and I notice that today is the first day to audition for the fall semester, and it ends at the end of March. It's February first.

So, I go to my music room, and I lock myself up there all day, looking for a song to do. I'm going for music, obviously, and I really think that I'll do a song with meaning so it'll have emotion, but it has to be really good.

Finally, I decided on the right song, and I realize schools out and it's Friday, so I demand everyone come over, and they do.

"Auditions for Juilliard started." I say.

"Okay?" Johanna asks.

"I think I have the song. It has to shock them and have emotion."

"And you need opinions." Finn nods. "Well, show us."

Mama shows up, and I explain everything to her, and she starts making lunch for us as I start to play the piano. They're all paying close attention.

_I'm losing myself_

_Trying to compete_

_With everyone else_

_Instead of just being me_

_Don't know where to turn_

_I've been stuck in this routine_

_I need to change my ways_

_Instead of always being weak_

_I don't wanna be afraid_

_I wanna wake up feeling beautiful..today_

_And know that I'm okay_

_Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways_

_So you see, I just wanna believe in me_

_La la la la la la la la_

_The mirror can lie_

_Doesn't show you what's inside_

_And it, it can tell you you're full of life_

_It's amazing what you can hide_

_Just by putting on a smile_

_I'm quickly finding out_

_I'm not about to break down_

_Not today_

_I guess I always knew_

_That I had all the strength to make it through_

_Not gonna be afraid_

_I'm going to wake up feeling beautiful..today_

_And know that I'm okay_

_Cause everyone's perfect in unusual ways_

_So you see, now, now I believe in me_

_Now I believe in me_

"That's perfect!" Peeta says.

Everyone agrees excitedly, and so I go up to my music room, and I record everything I have to, and then after making Daddy and Prim watch it, I send it. It'll take a while for a reply.

"Katniss?" Annie asks. "Um…I don't really ever ask people for help but…I think I wanna go to Juilliard so um…can you help me?"


	7. Chapter 7

I use every chance I have to teach Annie everything I know, and it gets to the point where I'm teaching her at lunch. My grades are perfect right now, and finals are approaching quickly. It's only March, but still. My GPA is sitting right at four, and if it could go higher, it would.

Everyone is starting to get very nervous, and college is getting to be a more common topic amongst the seniors. Peeta, Johanna, and Finnick are filling out applications, and I'm teaching Annie the basics of piano, and how to sing properly. It's simple, and she actually has a beautiful voice. Someone taps my shoulder, and I turn around.

Glimmer.

"Don't push me away; I'm not here to be a douche. I actually um…I need your help."

I look at her in shock and she sighs and sits down at the seat next to me. "You have straight A's and a 4.0. God knows if your GPA could go higher, it would. I know I've been a douche, but I'm failing chemistry, and my GPA is sitting at a 2.8. _Please_ help me."

I look at Annie, and I sigh. "Keep trying that song." I say. She nods. Mr. Cinna let us borrow his keyboard, and she keeps practicing it, and I turn and I help Glimmer.

It's fucking hectic in here, and after Glimmer understands, she thanks me and walks away, and I turn bac to help Annie, and a whole group of people come up to me for Environmental. I help all of them, and then go back to Annie.

She's got her song down pat, so I help teach her to sing it.

The bel rings so I take the keyboard back to Mr. Cinna's. It's his class next.

We practice hard songs for the rest of the class and I go to Chemistry and my teacher makes me help people that don't get it. Then, the last period, I have to help too.

I go home and help Annie until she has the song down, and the singing down, and she's perfect, so we take her video, and we send it.

And then Peeta shows up, and Annie leaves, and I help him with Chemistry, and it's stressful, and by the time we finish dinner, I fall asleep on the couch and don't wake up until the next morning.

….a….

The talk soon drifts from exams to Prom, which is about two months away.

Exams always get over late April, and we get out Mid May. Our Prom is May 31st, the only day that week of school that we don't have exams.

I start cramming the books, and helping people, and still help Annie with music, and I study a ton of people and it starts moving outside of school. Mama doesn't mind.

…..a…..

Exam week comes so fast that I start flipping out because I realized that I've been so bus helping others that I forgot all about me. I've had my nose in a book all day, and I walk into school on Monday, the day or first and second period exam, with the book open in my hands.

Eeta kisses my cheek when I sit down, and I just wave.

Nobody speaks. "Katniss." Peeta says after fifteen minutes. I wave him off. "Katniss." He says again. I ignore. "Katniss!" I don't respond. "Katniss, do you wanna go with me to prom?" he asks. I drag my eyes away from the book.

"What? I'm sorry…I just…"

"I _said_," he begins. "Do you want to go to prom with me?"

I smile. "Okay."

He smiles too, and kisses me, and then I go back to my book. The bell rings, and I wait till I have no choice but to go to class.

Technically, our high school graduation is on Saturday, the day after prom, and then seniors don't need to show up again.

….a….

I go home after the exams, which I aced, with everyone with me.

"Katniss." Mama says. Daddy's home early. "You got mail."

Her voice is casual.

Its then that I realize that Annie is here, too, and her parents are here. Mama hands me a letter, and Mrs. Cresta hands Annie one.

"Oh no, I can't open it. Peeta, you do it."

"Nope." He says. "It's yours." He looks excited.

"At the same time?" I ask Ann, and she nods.

"One, two three!" Annie says. We open them, and the room is filled with excitement and tension, as Annie and I read out letters in silence.

_Katniss,_

_Congratualtions! It gives me great pleasure to inform you that you have been accepted to the music program of Juilliard!_

I don't react, I just keep reading.

_You have been assigned to study with Miss Annie Kate Cresta._

It goes on to explain how I can get in contact with Annie.

"I didn't get in." Annie whispers.

"Liar! We're fucking roomates!"

She starts laughing, and everyone starts cheering, and Annie and I hug.

"They need the official transcript with proof of graduation by July first, we need to tell Juilliard that we're going by the first of May, and it requires a two hundred and fifty dollar deposit of enrollment."

"Our dorm is C18." Annie says.

"You guys get your own dorm together?" Johanna asks. We nod.

"Awesome. You don't have to wear clothes then."

We laugh, because it's true.

…..a…..

Peeta comes rushing into school, and nearly knocks me down. "Guess what?" he asks, kissing me.

"What?" I ask.

"I got into Stanford!"

Finn hears him, and starts hooting, and Johanna joins, because clearly, they're going together.

I'm excited for college, but I'm really going to miss these dumbasses.

**Yes, this story will send everyone to college.**


	8. Chapter 8

Stress is killing me right now because it's prom today.

I don't have a dress, or shoes, and everyone is ready but me. I have six hours to get a dress and shoes, get my hair and nails done, and my makeup, and meet the group.

Mama and I rush to the store and Daddy and Prim tag along. We run around the mall, and I pass many people I know from school. We stop at a random dress store, and I have five hours. I have to get the same color as Peeta. He said for me to get white. I find the perfect dress. It's a sweetheart neckline, the chest park is light gold that looks real, and it runs down like it's falling out of the chest part. It's long, and flowing, and my size. I grab it, and we run to a show store and I grab white heels. Mama rushes me to the nail place, which takes two hours, so now we have two hours left. We go to makeup which takes an hour, and hair, which takes 45 minutes.

I have that amount of time to get home and dressed and completely ready before the limo picks me up, and it's a half hour drive home.

We get there with fifteen minutes to spare, and we are all running around, making sure we got everything. Mama rips the tag off just as the limo horn jocks outside.

I'm standing here in my underwear. We start scrambling, and we have to force my boobs in the dress. I don't have time to put on shoes. I stuff my stuff into my gold clutch and grab my shoes, rushing downstairs, kissing everyone's cheeks as I bolt outside. On hand holds the clutch and my dress and the other hand holds my phone and my shoes.

Of course, as I'm rushing, I hear a clatter.

Fuck. I grab my phone and let out a groan, because it's done for. I thank the limo driver as he opens the door and almost trip on the way in. Johanna is laughing her ass off. She brought Blight from school, she's in a blood red dress and her hair is curled. Annie is in a pink dress and her hair is up in a cute bun, and I'm i. My dress and my hair is curled and up.

"Rough day?" Annie asks. I wipe my feet off on the carpet of the limo and let out a breath, nodding.

"I overslept. I had six hours to get everything, including the dress." I out my shoes on.

"Well you look beautiful." Peeta says and I smile and kiss him.

"You look handsome." I smile.

He smiles back.

This is going to be hard this next week. Annie and I are going up t Juilliard for some last minute before move in preparations, and Peeta, Finnick, and Johanna are actually going to leave for California, and they're getting an apartment.

Who knows when we'll see them again. I can see the pain in Annie and Finn's eyes, that this is their last real time together. The same look is on me and Peeta's eyes.

We got a hotel, a room for each of us. I don't know how tonight will play out. I don't know if we'll have sex, or if he'll just hold me. I'm still a virgin, and...he could not be the one. If we lose contact..."

I let Johanna distract me, because she sees me getting to that place. Just last night I was sobbing with Annie and Johanna was calming us down. We didn't tell the guys.

We can tell them tonight.

I hold onto Peeta's hand.

Hopefully nobody will stop us.

We arrive pretty quick, and people are inside. It's at some theater. We get out, and Peeta holds onto my arm. Everyone gets way ahead of us, and he pulls me aside.

"Listen." He says. "I love you, okay? Now, I know what you're thinking. Tonight is really out last night alone for...a long time. I love you, okay? Remember, I'll always find you, and I want you to have this." He holds out a ring.

"Peeta-"

"It's a promise ring." He whispers. It's gold and on the side there is half of a heart made out of diamonds. He puts it on my forth finger on my right hand, and he shows me another on. It's gold too, and his isn't diamonds, the half of his heart is carved out. "Together." He whispers. "We make one. Your my half, and I'm yours."

"Peeta." I whisper. "I love you so much." I hug him, but I don't cry, I just hold it in and let him take me inside.

We dance the night away. Nobody is in a bad mood.

Tomorrow is graduation. It starts at noon but all seniors have to be there at eleven. I have to be home by 9:30. I actually got a graduation dress.

Mama was pissed she couldn't take pictures, so she told me I better take a ton.

I get a junior to take a picture of all of us, and then the couples, and then me with all of them.

That'll please her. I make sure they're not blurry and then allow Peeta to yank me to the dance floor again.

...9...

The hotel is silent. We're not doing anything. "Peeta." I whisper. "Um...everyone else is expecting us to have sex. I don't know about it."

"I say we wait." He links our fingers. "Let's wait until we know for sure, that...that-"

"That we won't meet other people?" I whisper. He nods. "I won't. I want you, and only you. I love you."

"I love you too." He whispers.

"I'll save myself for you. College won't get to me. You're what I want." I kiss him, and then lay down in his arms. "What happens if we get separated?" I mumble after a while.

"We stay faithful." He whispers. "And we never take this off." He twirls the ring on my finger. "And I will find you Katniss, I swear I will. I love you baby, I love you."

"I love you too." I whisper.


	9. Chapter 9

This is probably the most depressing day of my life. Annie and I are going over to Peeta's, because the three of them are all packed, and they're leaving. My eighteenth was yesterday, and now they're leaving.

"I'm gonna cry." Annie whispers, looking out the window, her sunglasses blocking her emerald eyes from my sight.

"Me too, and I'm driving, so that's not good."

I know their car is packed, and they're driving together, and they're waiting on us. We pull up, and Annie refuses to get out of the car.

"Ann, come on." I whisper, nudging her shoulder. They're outside, and they're waiting. I unbuckle my seatbelt. "Annie."

"I can't do this."

"Ann, you can. You can do this. You love him, okay? We'll see them again."

"Four years is a really long time."

"I know, but its true love. That waits forever."

She sighs. "Fine." She unbuckles her seatbelt and gets out. I get out after her. Finnick an Peeta aren't paying attention, they're too busy fighting over who's driving.

"Your girlfriends are here." Johanna says. I can tell that this is hard for her, too. Both boys stop after Peeta shoves the keys in his pocket.

Nobody says anything for a long time, until finally I look away from them. Annie's arm is touching mine, and I can tell that I'm comforting her right now without even trying, and she's doing the same for me.

"Can we just get this over with please?" I finally mutter, looking a Peeta. My eyes are wet, and Annie won't take off her sunglasses.

I should have brought along my fucking sunglasses.

I _hate_ crying.

"Annie honey," Finn sighs. "Your sunglasses aren't doing a very good job of hiding your tears." He walks over to her, and he lifts the glasses off of her face.

"I really can't do this." She whispers, shaking her head and looking at the ground.

Of course, I want to run. I always want to run from my problems. I alwas ran from Glimmer, and I constantly try to run.

"Bye!" I say, and I bolt for the car.

Peeta's not stupid. He catches my hand.

"Katniss." He says quietly. "Don't."

I bite my lip, and I hug Johanna first. She hugs Annie and gets in the car.

I hung Finnick as Annie hugs Peeta.

"Take care of my girlfriend. If she has a guy, you better chop his balls off and let me know so I can feed them to him."

I laugh softly.

"And you take care of yourself." He turns completely serious. "I know this'll be hard for you, but don't start cutting again Kitty. If I find out, I'll fly out to New York and kick your damn ass to California."

I smile. "I'll be okay. Thanks Finn." I hug him and he hugs me back. Then, it's quiet, because Annie is done with Peeta.

"Alright." Finn says. "Come here." He pulls Annie into his arms and I walk right into Peeta's, burying my face in his chest. His body is warm, and he smells like cinnamon. His grip it tight and strong, and I never want him to let go of me.

"Katniss." He whispers after a few minutes. "Listen." He sighs, and he wipes away his tears. "It's going to be okay. If we lose contact or drift…I'll find you. I'll stay true to you. Don't you worry. I love you honey. I love you so much."

"I love you too." I whisper. "Don't forget about me, okay?"

"I won't, I promise."

"Besides," Finnick says loudly. "If we can't find you, I'm sure we'll be seeing Katniss on Ellen or something!"

We start laughing, because that's probably true.

I kiss Peeta, and it's a long kiss, and then I force myself to pull away. He says bye to his brothers and parents and then Annie joins me on the sidewalk, and we watch as they get in the car and drive away.

Mrs. Mellark is crying, so everyone goes inside, and I sling my arm around Annie's shoulder, and we stand there, staring after the black SUV, even though it's out of sight. Tears sit on our faces. "Ben and Jerry's therapy? My house?" Annie asks. I laugh softly and nod, and let her drive.

….a….

"Katniss!" Mama shouts. "Don't forget your guitars!" she's at the bottom of the stairs and I'm packing up my room. Annie and I have been together all summer, crying together even. It's July, and I miss Peeta and Johanna and Finn so much, and we skype all the time, but I miss his touch. Annie and I leave today, and I forgot to pack. Annie's helping me, so I run to my music room and pack up four guitars, 2 electric and two acoustic.

Annie is closing the last box when I walk inside. My car is already packed with her stuff. I add my guitars and we start adding my stuff, and then the car is packed, and I text Peeta that we're leaving and that I love him and I'll message him when I get there. Mama got my phone fixed the day after graduation.

Annie lost her phone and she won't get a new one, so she constantly steals mine to talk to Finnick. Her contacts are lost anyways and she says she doesn't have the time to put them in again.

I put my phone on the back in the car and hug Prim.

"Do you really have to go?" Prim asks.

"Yes Primmy, I really do." I kneel down in front of her. "I'll see you in the fall, okay sweetie?" I hug her, and kiss her forehead. She's crying when I let her go. I hug Daddy next.

"No boys, okay? Mellark's okay, but no more? Stay a virgin, don't have a baby, don't drink when cops are alound and take care of yourself, okay kiddo?"

I laugh. "I will Daddy."

I hug him, and he goes inside with Prim because she busted into hysterics. Mama's kicking the tires of my car and is making sure everything is perfect. Annie's in the passenger seat, waiting.

I approach Mama, and se starts talking about random stuff. Both of us are trying not to cry, and clearly she's putting off goodbye.

Finally, she takes my hand. "Don't forget baby, that before you get to the highway, you need to fill up your tank. I put a fifty in the ash tray in case you need it, and here's a map and a bible if you lose your way." She drifts into silence.

"Thanks Mama." I whisper, hugging her. The tears are falling from both of us. I go to get in the car.

"Oh, and one more thing sweetie." She says. "I love you and don't forget to remember me."

I smile. "I love you too Mama, I won't forget you."

"Don't forget this." Mama says, handing me my phone. I thank her and hand it to Annie, and I get in the car, and I wave. She stands in the driveway until she can't see the car anymore.

Annie and I are both silent. She's texting Finn, and I'm driving.

It's weird, moving. When you've lived somewhere your whole life, and then you leave, and you don't have the people you're used to around you. It's different, but I'm so glad I have Annie at my side.

**This is the end I'm starting a sequel right now.**


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